09Feb2010 Alexandrian Nights categories: Haiku Mint tea and chatter The air full of shisha smoke — It’s late, I don’t care Related 7 Comments on Alexandrian Nights beautiful tale… i can smell the air.. (if i may?!- so rude of me on my first visit – i think the i don’t care part falls very weak behind the marvel of the first two lines. hope you don’t mind too much..) Log in to Reply Welcome Dhyan Thank you for sharing your thoughts, and the most critical the feedback- the better in my opinion. The last phrase of the ending verse may seem out of place to many observers, but a traditional (if not compulsory) aspect of Japanese Haiku (English practioners of course are not really bound by rules, but many still insist on following them)is the inclusion of the Kireji – which is the “cutting word” – this is used to either represent a comparison or a contrast, depending on which verse, and where abouts in that verse it is applied. So for example, there would be a particular idea in the first two verses, followed by a complete shift in the final, “cutting” the poem in two. It is not easy to apply Kireji in Haiku, and you have to be careful that it isn’t too obvious or too obscure. Matuso Basho the master Haiku poet is a good reference, when looking at his work, some Kareji may seem down right random – but the poet’s intention is to show and not tell you what he is feeling. I am glad you brought this up though in case others were thinking the same. Sorry if I rambled on a bit, and you probably already know this anyway. I have still an immense amount to learn myself. Glad you liked it though, and I look forward to more feedback. TH Log in to Reply i am nothing when it comes to poetry and even if read some about it and haiku (i did but not to that extant) i always find it interesting and educating to hear another view. so no problem with rambling – the more the better i be honest and say i am still not sure about that last line but this is your work and heart and you do know the best. appreciate your detailed answer keep penning D! Log in to Reply love it, makes me wish I was there! Log in to Reply Please, can you PM me and tell me few a lot more thinks about this, I am really fan of your blog… Log in to Reply Yeezy Shoes http://www.yeezy.com.co/ Yeezy Shoes http://www.yeezys.us.com/ Yeezy http://www.yeezysupply.us.com/ Yeezy Shoes http://www.yeezy-shoes.us.com/ Yeezy Boost 350 http://www.yeezy-boost350.com/ Yeezy Boost 350 http://www.yeezyboost350.us.com/ Yeezy Boost 350 V2 Blue Tint http://www.yeezybluetint.com/ Adidas Yeezy 500 http://www.yeezy500utilityblack.com/ Yeezy 500 Utility Black http://www.yeezy500utilityblack.us/ Nike Air VaporMax http://www.vapor-max.org.uk/ Salomon UK http://www.salomon-shoes.org.uk/ Salomon http://www.salomons.me.uk/ Salomon Shoes http://www.salomonspeedcross4.org.uk/ Off White Air Jordan 1 http://www.offwhitejordan1.com/ Nike Air VaporMax http://www.nikevapormax.org.uk/ Nike React Element 87 http://www.nikereactelement87.us.com/ React Element 87 http://www.nikereactelement87.us/ Nike Plus http://www.nikeplus.us/ Nike Outlet Online http://www.nike–outlet.us/ Nike Outlet Store Online Shopping http://www.nikeoutletstoreonlineshopping.us/ Nike Outlet http://www.nikeoutletonlineshopping.us/ Cheap Nike NBA Jerseys http://www.nikenbajerseys.us/ Air Max 97 http://www.nikeairmax.us/ Air Max Nike http://www.max2017.us/ Air Jordan Shoes http://www.jordan-com.com/ Jordan 11 Concord 2018 http://www.jordan11-concord.com/ Cheap Yeezy Shoes http://www.cs7boots1.com/ Cheap NBA Jerseys http://www.cheapnba-jerseys.us/ Birkenstock UK http://www.birkenstocksandalsuk.me.uk/ Basketball Jersey http://www.basketball-jersey.us/ Balenciaga UK http://www.balenciaga.me.uk/ Balenciaga UK http://www.balenciagauk.org.uk/ Balenciaga http://www.balenciagatriples.org.uk/ Balenciaga UK http://www.birkenstocks.me.uk/ Balenciaga Trainers http://www.balenciagatrainers.org.uk/ Nike Air Max http://www.airmax270.org.uk/ Adidas Yeezys http://www.adidasyeezyshoes.org.uk/ Adidas Yeezy http://www.adidasyeezyshoes.org.uk/ Log in to Reply Jordan 12 Gym Red http://www.jordan12gymred.us.com/ nike factory outlet http://www.nikefactoryoutletstoreonline.com/ nike factory outlet http://www.nikefactoryoutletstoreonline.us/ Nike Outlet satore http://www.nikestores.us.com/ retro jordan 33 http://www.jordan33.us/ cheap jerseys from china http://www.cheapjerseysfromchina.us/ cheap custom nfl jerseys http://www.customnfljerseys.us/ air jordan 11 concord http://www.jordan11concord.us.com/ Jordan 12 Gym Red 2018 http://www.jordan12gymred.us/ Jordan 12 Gym Red 2018 http://www.redjordan12.us/ Yeezy Shoes http://www.yeezy.com.co/ Yeezy http://www.yeezys.us.com/ Log in to Reply Leave a Reply Cancel replyYou must be logged in to post a comment.